I have missed you
I would like to apologize about the lack of updates on the site over the last couple of months. Shortly after the Bridgetown Comedy Festival I was working on a new routine inside my practice box and managed to get locked inside for several months. Fortunately I was able to continue performing but the internet connection inside the box was pretty awful. Now that I have escaped please enjoy this recording of one of my sets from the box and expect more posts about the past few months and what is happening in the future.
Joke Church
Joke Church with Emmett Montgomery from
Sometimes I have so much sharing inside me, I just have to let it all out.
Happy Holidays
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The Holidays are upon us and I wish everyone well. Please enjoy this christmas card made by artist and animator Mark Allendar AKA Pastey Boy. It is my honor to be the voice of the Christmas tree and I hope it fills you with Christmas spirit.
The Phrase Off! Ross vs. Dan
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“The phrase off” is a jokewriting competition in which two competitors are given the first half of a phrase and a few hours to finish it. A panel of audience judges decides which phrase is funnier in a best 3 out of 5 competition. My good friend Chas and I came up with the idea during a night out when Chas stated how lazy his dick was. We went back and forth for hours
My dick is so lazy…
it got fired from a blowjob
it gets a soft on
it doesn’t nail chicks but occasionally it thumbtacks a girl
…that is how lazy my dick is.
after hours of this we came up with rules and I started hosting “phrase offs” around town and at Laffhole.
They are always a good time please enjoy this example featuring comedians Ross Parsons and Dan Carroll.
Jokes from Planet Nightmare- Teddy Bears
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Nocturnal Teddy Bear Visitation from Emmett Montgomery on Vimeo.
Occasionally people ask me where I get my jokes from. I don’t really have an answer. The most plausible explanation is that there must be some strange planet out there sending me signals from space. “Joke from Planet Nightmare” is a work in progress based on this idea. This would be one of those signals. My good friend Chas Roberts made this video staring the much loved teddy bear with spider legs using my words and drawings. - More moving pictures
